I was a bit anxious driving to the location where we were taping, remembering what happened the first time. I told myself to breathe. Relax. You got this and you know this. I prayed. But, the anxiety was still there and I have to admit, I did think about cancelling but I knew that if I did, then fear would win. PTSD would win. I would lose. I told myself, "Laurel, you are doing this and you're gonna rock this and you're going to win."
We all have a choice about how to respond to the circumstances in our lives and it's the only thing WE control. That's a lot of control. Think about it. We decide what is going to hold the power in our lives. I know that it's not always that simple if you deal with triggers and flashbacks because sometimes that overrides any ability to have a rational response, but we have a choice whether to let fear win or not. (Sidenote: Have you read Fearless Living by Rhonda Britten??? If not, check it out and read how much of a role fear plays in our lives. Rhonda is one of my everyday heroes and she thrived after trauma and has an amazing story.)
It's my current self-challenge right now, to fight fear when it appears. It won't necessarily go away completely, but feel the fear and do it anyway. Push through, don't let it steal opportunities from you and if necessary, ask for help when you need it.
So, here is the result of the taping of our segment on CTV Atlantic's Mental Health Minute - take number two - that aired this past week. Click on the link and the video will pop up.
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